I missed posting yesterday, as part of the 30 Day Blog Challenge. I've fallen behind before during this journey and really pushed myself to get caught up. Yesterday felt different. I didn't want to post. I felt pressure and I resisted it. Like a young child in tantrum, "I don't want to do it"!
I noticed I have expectations of what type of writing I produce. There's a particular feel and sense of completion I am looking for. I also hope for some insight that may help or inspire, you, the reader.
But what about me, inside I hear a small voice calling out! Stop putting these pressures on me. I am doing this ultimately for my own soul growth. This is about my writing from the heart daily. What about the days when my heart feels all in a jumble? What then?
Like yesterday, struggling with a family member. Feeling unsafe and confused, frustrated, wanting to run. Struggling to find my inner rhythm. I get a sense that may have happened a lot when I was growing up in my family home. It does not feel good. I get a glimpse of compassion surfacing. Maybe even for all the family members.
Raising a family is challenging, everyone under one roof, so many different sensitivities. All I want is to feel the love. Why else have a family really? If it's not about love, then what are we doing? Just throwing that question out to ponder on. I imagine it's more an evolutionary question. As our reasons for family have evolved over the centuries.
Getting back to writer's block, being that was the initial theme I began with.
Interesting how, in this post, I started with right where I was. Not wanting to write, and I followed that feeling. Where it took me was to some inner tensions I was feeling, that needed attention. I was trying to over ride that need with the pressure that I had a blog writing deadline to meet. By honoring that tension and going with it, I was able to access my creative flow again.
Could there be, that underneath writers block there is a need that is wanting attention? Maybe not in all cases, but at least in some situations. Perhaps we can clear the block by acknowledging the need and speaking to it and listening with care and interest. Maybe even write about it?
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